Tech Humors

The Customer and the Customer Support

Actual dialog of a former Customer Support employee: 

Support: "Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you? " 

Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect. " 

Support: "What sort of trouble? " 

Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away. ", 

Support: "Went away? " 

Customer:"They disappeared. " 

Support: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now? " 

Customer: "Nothing. " 

Support: "Nothing? " 

Customer: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type. " 

Support: "Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out? " 

Customer: "How do I tell? " 

Support: "Can you see the C:\ prompt on the screen? " 

Customer: "What's a sea-prompt? " 

Support: "Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen? " 

Customer: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type. " 

Support: "Does your monitor have a power indicator? " 

Customer: "What's a monitor? " 

Support: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on? " 

Customer: "I don't know. " 

Support: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that? "

 Customer: "Yes, I think so. " 

Support: "Great! Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall. " 

Customer: "Yes, it is. " 

Support: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one? " 

Customer: "No. " 

Support: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable. " 

Customer: "Okay, here it is. " 

Support: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer. " 

Customer: "I can't reach. " 

Support: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is? " 

Customer: "No. " 

Support: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over? " 

Customer:"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle-it's because it's dark. " 

Support: "Dark? 

Customer: "Yes-the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window. " 

Support: "Well, turn on the office light then. " 

Customer:"I can't. " 

Support: "No? Why not? " Customer: "Because there's a power outage. " 

Support: "A power... A power outage? Aha! Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in? " 

Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet. " 

Support: "Good! Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from. " 

Customer: "Really? Is it that bad? " 

Support: "Yes, I'm afraid it is. " 

Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them? " 

Support: "Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer. "

via Sololearn Nigeria